Your gifts will make room for you

Last night my son asked me what my goals were for 2024, and I simply said, “to utilize all my gifts to their fullest capacity.”

Being an artist, sometimes makes you want to share every vulnerable feeling that you are having so that you can show up authentically in the world, release the emotions while living in your truth, yet the desire to run away & hide can paralyze you because, your wounds are being exposed. & Although I know that the best bodies of work are created through adversity, resilience & perseverance.. —we creatives get tired of needing those attributes to make our “things”.

What I AM committing to for the future is to continue to show up and truly present exactly who I am, in all of the ways not worrying about if it lands perfectly.. because if I don’t at least share, what is the point of me having these gifts, like, really? Yet, as I am still working through the decision of sacrednesses vs. vulnerability—balance will be the focal point for these lessons for ME & knowledge for the collective. That’s honest.

When deciding how we want to walk through this world, we often consider others opinions & thoughts of us a bit too much, however. We may even worry that our true self may not be received well by people that know who we “used” to be. “My vibe will attract my tribe,” that’s my new motto. & whomever isn’t too keen with this authentic self that I’ve discovered has yet to truly experience or love me as a person—because accepting my evolution was never in their plan, apparently. They may only be comfortable loving who I once was to them… & may want to keep me there. & even though their choice to do so in the confines of their mind, I will show gratitude for them being apart of my journey & am thankful for the universe moving them away from my energetic space at this time, too.

As I naturally evolve & simultaneously come home to myself, I uncover parts of me that I never knew existed— especially if they were drowned by past trauma + many people’s attempts to tell me who I needed to be. Unpacking all of that shit has been the most beautifully crafted challenge to date.

In the words of Lauryn Hill, “Do you know how hard it is to tell the people that you love the most who you truly are? I didn’t even know me, I had to introduce myself to my Mother & Father. Y’all don’t know ME, I’m just getting to know me. So excuse me, but I don’t want to fit into your ‘box’.. “ (MTV Unplugged No. 2.0–Interlude 5: 2022)

My creator created me to create, they also dipped me in the uniqueness of my multiple expressions that I am so blessed to be able to choose in which I use to pour into the world. & that’s exactly what I’m going to do. Stretch them all. One gift at a time.

Letting go of the idea that perfection exists, will allow you to just BE. So peace be with you as you figure out where your gifts lie, work through all of your life lessons, & hopefully help someone else as you choose which ones to reveal.

Nik ✨